I've Been Summoned

So I guess it's that time of year where I start pissing off the administration. Namely, one of the VPs at school. Ugh! Let's call him...Mr. Adhd.

I'll try and make this short. So yesterday was my meeting with two of my students who have the nutty father (adopts minority, special ed boys). I was told Tuesday that the father came to school, popped in to Mr. Adhd's office and stated that he WOULD NOT be attending my meetings! (As if this were some sort of punishment to us!) Mr. Adhd and I did a little dance. Anyway, fast foward to yesterday. I stopped into the office - prior to my meetings - and was told that the father stopped in AGAIN. This time to say that J - one of the boys - was being forbidden to attend the meeting. Now, understand that J. is a 19 year old student. (He'll be 20 in July). I told Mr. Adhd that dad couldn't do this that the boy was an "adult", the rights for the services provided to him had been transferred to J and that dad did not have, nor want guardianship. Mr. Adhd basically said, "I'm just telling you what dad said and what's going to happen."

I was tormented on what to do. I sought Lisa's advice and she said, "Go see FW." (Our department head. And by the way, FW and I don't have a problem with each other so I was completely comfortable doing this). I immediately went to FW, told her my predicament and she said, "Dad can't do that." I told her I didn't feel like I was getting support in this from Mr. Adhd. She said she would talk to him and explain the law. (Yeah, good luck...guy doesn't hear anything I think but the voices in his head and his own heartbeat...always racing). FW and I also decided that the best route to take would be to talk to J and leave the decision up to him.

So, I went to class, a study hall which just happened to be J's study hall. We talked. He told me his dad didn't want him going. I explained that if he wanted to go, he had a right being 19 and all. I asked him if he knew why his father didn't want him there. First he said he didn't know. Then he said he knew but he didn't want to tell. Then he said it was because of "family business". I told J that I wasn't interested in his family business that this meeting was about his future and education. I showed him the IEP so that he could see what we would be talking about. I told him that at 12:30 (because I would be in meetings), Lisa would remind him that his meeting was about to start and it was then up to him if he came or not.

Well, guess what?! After I sat in the conference room and told the lady from the school J would be attending next year and the ladies from MRDD that J most likely wouldn't be attending - he showed up! I was shocked. So we sat down and had the meeting. About 2 minutes in, Mr. Adhd showed up. Pissed. After I completed my portion of the meeting I was about to send the attendance page around for everyone to sign and then turn it over to the ladies from MRDD when Mr. Adhd interrupted. Pissed. (Oh, and by the way, I specifically said in the meeting and to J when we talked it over that I would not ask him to sign anything to put the plan in place...that I understood he didn't want to do that.) He basically ranted that J wasn't supposed to be there, his wishes (Mr. Adhd's) didn't count for shit and that he was now going to have to go call the parent to tell what happened. He grabbed J and left. And never came back. Embarrassing. In front of 4 outside individuals! Oh, and one of the ladies? A parent of a senior.

So I see FW out in the main part of the office and I pull her in and explain the shituation. She said, "I talked to him about this!" She also said that the only thing he was worried about in J attending was ending up in the superintendent's office. Hmm...worried about your own ass I see. Well, FW basically said I did nothing wrong. I followed the law and left the choice up to J.

Story not over! I get home and have an email from Mr. Adhd asking that during my plan I meet with him and HH. Shit! So I email back that I'd be happy to but that I'm asking FW to come as well.

The only thing I have to say is this: None of the things yesterday was about Mr. Adhd. It wasn't about the father of J. It was about J. I was trying to be an advocate for him. I was trying to do what was best for him. And I was following the law. I went to my department head and sought her advice. I wasn't worried about my ass ending up in the sling nor Mr. Adhd's. I was worried about J. That is the only motivation I had yesterday. And I won't apologize for that.

K - now I have to go get ready and deal with this day. Later.