AmeriSpeak

So I was looking the other day at some clever sayings dealing with heat (It's hotter than...) and I came across a website called "AmeriSpeak". It's meant mainly to assist those learning English and the lingo/idioms that we Americans sometimes use in everyday conversation. The thing that cracked me up, however, are the number of sayings that I had never heard. What the hell are we (and by we, I mean this stupid website) teaching these poor people trying to learn Americanese!? Here are some examples:

THEY SAID: God's tater wagon turned over!
WE SAY: That was loud thunder!
Me: Huh? I've never heard that bit of gobbligook

THEY SAID: Hits a frog strangler
WE SAY: Its raining very hard
Me: What the hell is a frog strangler!?

THEY SAID: Fishy, fishy in the brook, daddy catch them with a hook, mama fry them in a pan, baby eat them like a man!
WE SAY: I hope the fish are biting!
Me: What the hell kind of hill billy person made this shit up!?

THEY SAID: Sharp as a bag of wet mice.
WE SAY: Not too bright.
Me: Now, I've never heard this before but I like it! Here's a good sentence: Maggie is about as sharp as a bag of wet mice!

THEY SAID: I could chew nails, and fart tacks.
WE SAY: Extremely agitated.
Me: Again, I haven't heard this before but I certainly enjoy the picture it put in my mind! Note to self: Use this next time a student irritates the crap out of you!

THEY SAID: I'm finer'n frog hair and twice as fluffy.
WE SAY: I feel really good.
Me: Frogs don't have hair!

THEY SAID: She's a sandwich short of a picnic.
WE SAY: She is insane.
Me: Another keeper!

THEY SAID: I'll be dipped!
WE SAY: I can hardly believe it
Me: I'll be dipped...reminds me of ice cream cones...love it!